H

I liked not knowing where you were. I still don't know for sure, but I have more information now than I've had in a year. I just assumed you dead, and I could live with that. I also daydreamed about running into you some day, and still not wanting to be your friend, but maybe calling someone who might care, someone I care about, and saying, "yeah, she didn't look good, you should do something about it." So maybe you'll be okay, and many miles away, and I'll just have to get used to that reality. I still feel like it's a competition, and I've always known you were capable of winning, easily, now more than ever if the rumors are true, and I'll have to get used to that reality as well, and try a little harder myself.